Staying home doesn’t bother me. It is the overwhelming sadness of everything, the sick being alone at hospital beds, the families not being able to bury their deceased, the fear you can touch on the streets, on the few times you go out to buy food.
The sound of the ambulances. We now hear them all of the time. My husband points them out sometimes, other times I do. Apart from the birds, sirens are the only other sound coming from the streets.
I cry once a week. It seems to have become a pattern. I have very good days, but then one day comes that overwhelms me with sadness and fear, and the feeling of uncertainty is just too much. Then, I cry.
I have read a lot these days about the pandemic. I feel like I want to be a part of this History, living something that the next generations will only read in books, like we read about the plague or the French Revolution. I want to feel it, to know it, to know what is going on here and everywhere. To be able to say “I was there, and I saw it” to the grandchildren I will never have.
But one thing baffles me the most, on all I have read. On all the philosophers, academics, all the relevant thinkers of our time that are writing about the world in this pandemia, there is this thing that bothers me: they are all thinking of solutions, reactions and possibilities through the lenses of the world that was. A world pre-pandemia. This will not work. The world post-pandemia will be a completely new one, totally different. We don’t know what it is going to be but thinking about reconstructing looking back doesn’t seem to me to be the most reasonable way. We must think of a completely different society, economy, relationships. Everything will change, because it needs to change. And because it is time for change. If we can’t radically change things after this physical and mental worldwide reboot, we will never, ever, ever change anything.
I, for one, am changing. When all this started, I thought I knew a lot. I thought I knew about how economies work, and governments and laws and what is best for people. The pandemia probably proved me wrong in every single way. It is not easy, and in fact it is very disturbing. But it is nonetheless necessary, if we want to build something new and fresh. Now is the time! There has been enough suffering, enough death. We should not let this opportunity slip through our fingers. Let’s toss all we knew (or thought we knew) out the window, and let’s start again.
I read an article by Thomas Friedman the other day where he suggests we should continue to work, at least those who are able to or less at risk, in order to save the economy. I’ve always liked Friedman. But now it strikes me as odd that, when the ultimate purpose of a healthy economy is to allow people to live decently and happily, we are now proposing sacrificing their lives to save the economy. Who works for whom? Why should I sacrifice my life to an economic system who clearly is not working – if this system’s only solution is to kill people to keep itself alive, I dare say it is not an economic system I want to be a part of. I think Friedman, with all his knowledge and intelligence and Nobel prize, would serve us best if he tried to find a solution for an economic system that worked for the people, and not the other way around. And no. I am not saying socialism or communism. Those did not work either, people got killed to feed the system, just the same.
We’re all in this together, but still… when push comes to shove, all we listen from people who are close to us is how it affects them, what will happen to them, their problems, their difficulties, their opinion. Get over yourselves, people. This is a tragedy for everyone, it is a fucking global pandemic! Everyone will lose! Some will lose their lives, some their money, some their loved ones, some their long-term health. Face it once and for all: you will not get out of it unscathed. Working together and collaborating is the only way to minimize the damage, given the circumstances. Again, get over yourself! You’re not the only one feeling sick, or angry, or anxious, or worried. You’re not the only one with a loved one in the hospital. You’re not the only one who lost your savings, lost your business, got fired. If you have a house to live in and isolate, be effing grateful. If you have running water to wash your hands, be effing grateful. If you can buy food and pay rent, be effing grateful. It is not easy to live through this, I know. But I assure you, someone is having it worse.
Once one of your loved ones die alone in a hospital and you can’t even bury him/her or have a mass in his/her honor, the economy will be (or should be) the least of your worries.
You will be old one day. Don’t dismiss the elderly. Sacrificing their lives because they don’t work is not only a mistake. It is disgusting and makes you less of a human being.
Once this is all over, we will need to collaborate, more than ever. There will be a lot of unemployment and poverty, but if we did our homework right during the quarantine, we will have learned that if we all share a little, and accept losing a little, we will all have a little.
Music fills our days and souls. Listen to more music, sing.
If you can laugh with your partner during quarantine, your relationship will last. If you can’t, rethink it. Life is fragile, and sometimes very short.
All that our governments said before about not having money for universal basic income or public health care was a lie. They can come up with the money when it is needed. Let’s keep the pressure once this is over.
Yes, your privacy still matters, and should matter. But yes, we will live in a world of strong and ubiquitous surveillance after all this is said and done. And I don’t know what to think of it.
I think I will want to live a simpler life. Even simpler than now. I realized I am comfortable quarantining in a tiny apartment with my husband. I can live with less and be happy with less. I want less.
Stay away from toxic people. Because if coronavirus doesn’t contaminate you, they will.
Thank you, humans, for the internet. It would be something else without it.
Let teenagers get bored. There’s nothing wrong with being bored. Getting bored is good for you. This is an effing global pandemic, it is ok if they don’t have activities all.of.the.time. And yes, little children will spend more time in front of screens. So what? Everybody is doing something they shouldn’t, like snacking all day long on Oreos. Leave them alone.
Giri / Haji is a super cool series on Netflix, I thought you should know.
Prince Charles tested positive. A friend suggested this is a conspiracy by the Queen to put William in charge. Is it? We’ll never know…
Drosophila Melanogaster 